Saturday, February 08, 2014

I couldn't have paid for university without having sex for money...

Back when I was a student I listened to a lot of Hot Chip and fucked a lot of guys for money. I basically have a degree in fucking. I have a proper degree too, on our much-loved English language and its lofty literary heritage. I got a first. Higher education taught me how to use my tongue in every sense, from clever syntax to cleverly working it around wherever I was paid to do so. These two qualifications are not unconnected. Without having sex for money I wouldn’t have been able to support myself during my studies. Nor would I have been able to move away from my hometown, which was essentially shut down with the mines in the 80s. So I did what I had to do. As politicians of all persuasions are fond of telling the unemployed, you can get a job if you really want one. You just get down on your hands and knees and scrub toilets for a living, right? And if a man who wants his dick sucking happens to pop in while you’re doing it, you stay put, open your mouth and get yourself a week’s cleaning wages with a mouthful of spunk.

I was in the audience for Channel 5’s Big Benefits Debate on Monday night. At one point, Edwina Currie told a young mum from Benefits Street that she should just get a job. “Give me a job then, innit!” screamed the girl. Comment of the night, if you ask me. It’s all very well telling people to go out and work but where the fuck are they supposed to work? Are you doing anything to help create jobs, Edwina? We can’t all get paid to go on Strictly Come Dancing. My mum was a project manager at Boots for 16 years but they had to let her go last winter. She is yet to find another job, and not through want of trying. Four years after graduation, I don’t have a full-time job either, and I know plenty of post-grads in their twenties who work in bars and cloakrooms. Or both. Maybe that’s why there are no vacancies? Because some people have two or three jobs just so they can afford to live? If know-alls with degrees can’t find work, people in big cities, people with years of experience in the workplace, how the fuck are the residents of James Turner street and others like them supposed to magic up careers for themselves?

Taking people off benefits solves nothing without job vacancies. They’re going to turn to crime instead. Or prostitution. I did, and studies show I’m not the only one. Research conducted in 2010 shows that 25 percent of students know someone who has worked in the sex industry to fund their studies. In 1990, it was just 3 percent. Middle-class kids go to university with the promise of a good position when they graduate – but it was never meant to be doggy style. Full story...

Related posts:
  1. Sex for tuition fees: Are universities just refusing to face up to the facts?
  2. Schoolgirls solicit sugar-daddy dates in Tokyo's Akihabara...
  3. Liberian women battle against 'sex for grades' at universities...
  4. Toronto students seek love with a price tag on ‘sugar daddy’ website...
  5. Students in Berlin willing to prostitute themselves to pay for school...
  6. Students becoming prostitutes and turning to sugar daddies...
  7. Madagascar: Girls selling sex to pay for school...
  8. The taxi queens of South Africa: swapping sex for free rides to school...
  9. English students turning to prostitution to fund studies...

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